What if I told you your personal identity is your gift to the world. Would you laugh? Well, here’s what I mean: according to Jamie Winship, your identity is your gift to the world. No one else can bring the gift you can in the truth of who you are.
But here’s the problem: if people can’t see who you actually are, it makes it tough for them to receive the gift.
I could make a case that when you hide who you actually are, you’re not being humble. You’re withholding your gift. The world needs what only you can contribute. We have enough problems in the world these days that we really need everyone.
In this article, I’m going to share why I diminished myself for years, the moment I realized I could do more, and how my work helping people express their personal identity visually became my way of helping solve bigger problems. You’ll discover why hiding yourself keeps your contributions from being received, and why showing up authentically is actually stewardship of your unique gift.
Last week we talked about Jamie Winship’s (aff. link) ministry of helping people find their unique God-given identities and his teaching about the significance of beauty. He also teaches that your identity is your gift to the world. No one else can give the gift you can in the truth of who you are.
This is a profound statement about how contribution actually works. The world doesn’t need us to all be doctors or coders. The world needs you: your specific perspective, your unique wiring, your particular combination of gifts that exists nowhere else.
But here’s what most women struggle with: we’ve been trained to think that diminishing ourselves is virtuous. We make ourselves smaller to make space for others. We hide our strengths to avoid seeming arrogant. We downplay who we are because we’ve absorbed messages that taking up space is selfish.
The result? Our contributions aren’t happening. Not because we’re not capable, but because people can’t see who we actually are. They can’t recognize us as the kind of person who has the capacity to solve the problems we’re uniquely equipped to address.
WHY I DIMINISHED MYSELF
For years, I diminished myself for what I believe was a noble reason. My husband was an ISTJ who had grown up without the opportunity to be seen and valued for who he was. I loved and respected him deeply, and I wanted to create space for him to shine. So I made myself smaller. I lessened myself to give that gift to someone I cared about.
This wasn’t malicious. It wasn’t even conscious for a long time. It was an act of generosity that went too far, the way generosity often does for women who care deeply about others.
THE MOMENT I REALIZED I COULD DO MORE
Fall 2019. Spokane was in the midst of a heated race for mayor and homelessness was the central issue. I was driving down the street and saw people crossing with all their belongings in a shopping cart. In that moment, I was convicted with a simple truth: I could do more.
Not in a guilty way. Not in a “you’re not doing enough” way. Just a clear recognition that I had capacity and ability that wasn’t being fully used to address real problems in the world.
But what could I do? I’m not a policy maker. I’m not a social worker. I’m not running a nonprofit that directly serves people experiencing homelessness.
Here’s what I realized: this is the skill I have. I can help people look like themselves with less effort and fewer resources. And when people can show up authentically without expending enormous energy figuring out what to wear, they have more capacity to contribute to solving the problems we face collectively.
The more people look like who they actually are, and the less effort they have to devote to that, the more they can contribute to the things that actually matter.
WHAT ONE PROBLEM WOULD YOU FIX?
Here’s a question I want you to sit with: If you had the power to fix one problem facing humanity today, what would it be?
Don’t overthink this. Just notice what comes to mind first. What problem makes your heart ache? What issue do you wish you could address if you had the resources, the platform, the influence?
Whatever you just thought of, that’s your clue. That’s the problem you’re uniquely wired to care about, to understand, to potentially help solve.
Now here’s the hard truth: the world needs you working on that problem. And if you show up looking like who you actually are, you won’t have to work as hard to get others to see you and listen to you.
If you’re invisible because you’re hiding your true identity, people don’t recognize you as someone who has the capacity to address that issue. If you’re showing up as who you think you should be rather than who you actually are, people are receiving a diluted version of your gift.
Your personal identity is your gift. And that gift is meant to be expressed.
WHY PERSONAL IDENTITY MATTERS
Expressing your personal identity visually is the most effective way to be seen and recognized for the contributions you’re meant to make.
This isn’t about vanity. It’s about stewardship. You’ve been given a unique design—your personality, your cognitive functions, your natural energy, your visual presence. All of these work together to communicate who you are.
When your visual presence aligns with your actual identity, people can see you. They recognize you as the kind of person who has the capacity for certain kinds of work. They take you seriously. They receive your contributions.
When there’s misalignment—when you’re hiding, diminishing, or presenting a version of yourself that isn’t true—people miss who you actually are. Your contributions don’t land because they’re coming from someone people can’t quite see clearly.
The FREE Myers-Briggs Key to Signature Style video masterclass explains exactly how your personality type relates to your visual expression. It shows you why understanding your cognitive functions unlocks insights about how you’re uniquely designed to show up in the world.
FROM INVISIBILITY TO PERSONAL IDENTITY
This is why The Congruence Code exists. It’s not about making you look good so you can feel confident, though that happens. It’s about helping you express your personal identity visually so you can be seen and recognized for the contributions you’re meant to make.
When you understand your personality type through cognitive functions, you understand how you’re actually wired. When you receive your Personality Style Blueprint, you get the building blocks for expressing that wiring visually. When you get your Seasonal Energy Digital Palette, chosen collaboratively based on how you experience yourself, you have colors that honor who you actually are.
All of this works together to help you show up authentically. And when you show up authentically, people can see you. When people can see you, they can receive your contributions.
The world has enormous problems that need solving. You care about at least one of them deeply. You have unique capacity to contribute to addressing that problem. But your contribution is unlikely to happen if you’re invisible.
Expressing your personal identity visually is the most effective way to be seen and recognized for the contributions you’re meant to make.
Here’s something simple you can do this week to integrate these principles into your life:
Use that question as a conversation starter this week. Ask someone you trust: “If you had the power to fix one problem facing humanity today, what would it be?” Listen to their answer. Then share yours. Don’t try to solve anything. Just notice what problems people care about deeply, and notice what you care about deeply. This is the beginning of recognizing that your unique concerns are clues to your unique contribution. And your contribution needs your authentic personal identity to be expressed so it can be received.
If you’re ready to express your personal identity visually so you can be seen and recognized for the contributions you’re meant to make, The Congruence Code is designed for exactly that. You’ll discover your personality type through a two-hour profiling conversation, receive your Personality Style Blueprint that gives you the building blocks for expressing your identity visually, and get a Seasonal Energy Digital Palette chosen collaboratively based on how you experience yourself. This isn’t about vanity. It’s about stewardship of your unique gift. The world needs what only you can contribute, but that contribution can’t happen if people can’t see who you actually are. Use the contact form below to schedule your personality profiling conversation and begin the journey of expressing your personal identity authentically.