Summary: Your enneagram instinct is one of the most overlooked tools for understanding your personal style. In this episode, I break down what each enneagram instinct — self-preservation, social, and sexual — looks like in the wardrobe, what new research reveals about how instinct shows up in the images you’re drawn to, and how I use image collections to read the aesthetic themes connecting personality to visual identity.
So what is the Enneagram? In broad terms, it is a personality typology system.
Unlike Myers-Briggs, which describes your cognitive wiring and is the foundation of your visual identity work with me, the Enneagram describes the core motivations that drive our egos.
It’s less who you innately are, and more a strategy.
There are nine Enneagram types, and honestly, I don’t think your type number is the most important piece for defining your signature style.
What I do see a strong connection to are the Enneagram survival instincts.
Most people know their enneagram number, but your enneagram instinct for survival is the more useful tool for understanding your personal style.
There are three instincts: self-preservation, sexual, and social.
Everyone has all three, but in a different order of preference. One is dominant, one is secondary, and one is repressed.
How does your enneagram instinct relate to your wardrobe?
The self-preservation instinct is attuned to personal comfort and physical needs.
In the wardrobe, that looks like:
- Prioritizing comfort and tactile quality in fabrics
- Preferring looser, non-restrictive fit
- Tending toward neutrals and classics
- Leaning toward blending in rather than standing out
- Seeing durable, investment pieces as the smart choice
The sexual instinct is attuned to intensity and attraction dynamics.
In the wardrobe, that looks like:
- Dressing appropriately for the social context
- Choosing versatile pieces that work across settings
- Selecting items that can serve as conversation starters
- Following what’s expected in a given environment
- Fitting in, while still trying to be interesting
Where is your enneagram instinct in images you love?
Here’s where the research gets interesting.
Two groups, Empathy Architects and Enneagrammer, have independently discovered that the images you’re drawn to reveal your dominant instinct more accurately than any quiz.
What they found is that each instinct has a recognizable visual signature.
Self-preservation dominant people are drawn to images with an energy of home and settling. More earth than sky. Objects, textures, “stuff.” Spaces that feel inhabited and safe.
Sexual instinct dominant people are drawn to images that are high contrast and psychologically charged. Singular focal points. Transformation themes. Images that pull you in rather than simply please you.
Social instinct dominant people are drawn to images with multiple focal points, playful energy, status references, and a sense of “what’s interesting about me.” Head-on portraits. The vibe of being cool.
How I use images in my work with women
When a woman comes to me for a Style System Synthesis call, one of the first things I ask her to do is collect images.
Not images of outfits. Images of anything she finds beautiful or compelling.
Most style systems sort you into a type and hand you a set of rules. What I’m doing is different.
I’m reading the images for the aesthetic themes that connect her personality to her visual identity. That’s part of Signature Style Foundations.
The images tell me what words often can’t.
If you’ve found yourself in other style systems but shopping and getting dressed still isn’t easy, that’s exactly the conversation I want to have with you.
My approach is personalized, based on your personality, your aesthetic, and your body design.
The Style System Synthesis call is free. We look at what you already know about yourself and figure out what’s missing. If that is right for you, get yourself on my calendar here.